Blogger Widgets Struggling Parents: Pity Myself

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Pity Myself

Pity Myself

If anyone knew how to make life complicated it would be me. I grieve over the most simple situations and pity myself more than anyone I have ever met. Why must I continue to make the same mistakes? I look for the most simple of answers through sorrow. I think in the most negative ways. I can make the most easiest of situations and make them to be the most complicated ones. Just ask my Mother, or my children and they will know exactly what I am referring to.

I grew up as a lonely child, my Dad molested me when I was 6. My Dad had always called me “Teddy Bear”. My Brother and twin sister thought I was the favorite one and yet I was the one he intimately chose.

My alcoholism started when I was 18 years of age. My Mother continually told me that I was a candidate for becoming an alcoholic.

I was married by the time I was 27 and I’d already had 1 daughter by the time I was 21. My married life style was basically a alcoholic world, living in mostly a turmoil of Hell-o…My wedding day “WAS” the best day of my life, but when I met my true love after my divorce took the place of that moment. I could no longer believe that “Love” was all complicated.

You can make life complicated or you can make it difficult, what ever you chose it to be. An alcoholic lives in a life of make believe. Living in denial, negative outlook and full of pain of loneliness.
The only way out was “faith” …believe in that higher power that had more strength, then I’d ever believe. Sure I was in denial, but isn’t anyone with an addiction?








My other blog;
1. Across this bridge
2. Marketing myself
3. Struggling parents
4. When life become a book
5. Read Between the Lines
6. Internet Lifestyle
7. The Sleeping Turtle Art Gallery




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2 comments:

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